a baby

There's a kid inside me, but I'm still a kid, but I'm 25. 

Sometimes the kid kicks me and so I know there really is an actual person inside my body.

So completely weird I don't know what to say. 

Foreign. Strange. 

. . . Nice. 

Scary.

Really happy. 

sometimes sad. 

I've been changing a lot, my body and life has been changing.   

9 months is a good amount of time to begin to wrap your head around it, though, I think. 

Intentional thoughts intentional thoughts intentional thoughts about

intentional thoughts about giving birth, about my body, about giving birth, about sleeping well at night with a soccer ball inside my abdomen, about giving birth, about

listening to intentional thoughts now and its helping me feel better about 

myself and everything and i love this kid, it's strange. 

We call him his name and talk to him and talk for him, 

we know when he comes out he won't talk at all for a long time,

He'll probably sleep, mostly, at first. 

He's big now he weighs 2 lbs and is over a foot long and that's all inside me and it kind of jiggles when I run.

I heard he can get the hiccups in there, and I smile thinking about that.

Hey bud we love you.

Hey bud we love you.

Hey bud, we really love you a lot. 

(which is kind of strange and foreign and yet honest and constantly felt by his

mom)

I feel kind of weird saying baby so I call him a kid or kiddo or little guy but he'll be a baby not a kid when we meet

intentional thoughts about that day intentional thoughts help me look past fear to the cute kiddo who i already love and help me love my body and trust it love that day and trust my body love and trust my body have confidence have confidence and have confidence and peace. 

I love when he kicks.

Hi bud.